Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Elastic No-No Band - The Guy Who Dies

You know, there are things that happen that make me want to throw up my hands and simply give up. Diane Feinstein, for example, today said she voted for this dude to be attorney general even though he was openly willing to commit illegal acts in the name of our country. Why? This is paraphrased, but basically she said he was honest about his willingness to do illegal things. Implication is - everyone else lies. So, let’s go ahead and take the guy who is open about his filthy inner desires. Stuff like this makes me want to cry. What’s left to do??? Hide my head in a shell and puke for hours? Doesn’t hurt Feinstein or Mukasey if their fellow citizens cry about the state of our country. Especially since neiother gives a twat and they are leading us. So, puke away, Eartaste, puke away.

But there is a solution! A wonderful solution! The Elastic No-No Band to the rescue!!!

“I am running from disaster! I am running from aliens!
I can’t outrun them, I can’t outsmart them!
I’m not gonna make it, I’m not Tom Cruise!
He might get cut up – a little bloody,
But I’ll explode leaving just my shoes. Because
I’m the guy who dies in the first reel of the film
In some disgusting way.”

Lest you decide that this song was written just for me to make me feel better this day, forget that noise. The next verse makes that very clear. “This is NOT a metaphor.” Forgive me for using it as one, I needed a laugh really bad today. Shoutouts for Cheese Fries, Nobody’s Wife, and the re-run (Everywhere I Look) I See Your Face.

Elastic No-No Band